on reflection

Whilst I cannot and should not say what has happened at work, I am able to describe the effect (affect?) it has had on me.
I feel like I have been shot in the back of the head.
Come to a standstill and realise there is blood leaking from somewhere but I can't find the wound.

I exaggerate?
perhaps.
I have been bought up sort by my own arrogance (overconfidence?)
Also, I am aware that the team I work with are absolutely without question "out to get me".
I need to remain focused but the stress is tangible when you feel you have to be "beyond reproach" as a leader.
Is it worth it? is my job worth the stress? probably, yes.
At the moment it's just a probably.

I am challenging myself with some extra work in a different environment which will either give me a boost and take me back to my personal values and beliefs or will make me think, oh-oh I need a new career!!!
We watch and wait and see..